Monday, July 6, 2009


I find it difficult to appreciate judgmental people both as a man and as an internet entrepreneur. Do you not find them the most hypocritical of people?

Growing up, I learnt that when I point a finger at someone, the other three are pointed towards me. Even the thumb is pointing in my direction. That left an indelible impression on my psyche because now when I witness someone criticising, gossiping or judging another person, I mentally see the fingers and think, “I wonder what is there to criticise and gossip about you”.

No one is perfect. One of the top attributes of a human being is our ability to make mistakes and an even better attribute is to learn from our mistakes. When a woman cheats on her husband, for example, that does not make her a whore in my eyes. I would not stop talking to her or treat her any different as a result. If she chooses to learn from it with or without getting caught, good luck to her. If she doesn’t, I will not treat her differently, end of story.

When we judge people, we almost always use limited information. If we were privy to all the information, our judgment might change. This is why it is not advisable to waste time passing judgment in the first place. It is less complicated accepting people the way they are. If they do something that truly shocks me, I process the information within and come to the conclusion that we are human and capable of anything.

A friend of mine has recently started as an internet marketing entrepreneur and he is finding the going tough. I hope he succeeds because I admire his determination and his courage. When he spoke to his friends about starting his business, they ridiculed him and placed bets that if he started he would fail.

Bizarrely, they judged him before he even started. That he had the courage to get out of his comfort zone and ignore his peers already demonstrates that he is a man who has what it takes to succeed. In fact, my friend has pasted pictures of his friends in his home office that serves as motivation for his success.

Do you know what his friends do for a living? Two are unemployed and one works in a bar. Not that I am judging them. My message to judgmental people is judge not, unless you judge yourself first.

For those who listen to what others say as a guide as to how they live their lives, all I’ll say is I hope the person you are listening to has a track record of success. If not, I suspect that the person you are listening to is one who does not have the courage to change his undesirable situation and instead spends his life away discouraging others to step out and make their dreams come true. Not that I am one to judge.

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